- The Billboard Song
- (could be sung to the tune of "The Battle Hymn of the Republic",
among others)
As I was walking down the street one dark and dreary day,
- I came upon a billboard and much to my dismay,
- The sign was torn and tattered from the rain the night
before.
- The wind and rain had done its work and this is what
I saw:
Smoke Coca-cola cigarettes, chew Wrigley's Spearment beer.
- Kennel Ration dog food makes your wife's complexion clear.
- Simonize your baby with a Hersey's candy bar.
- And, Texaco's the beauty cream that's used by all the
stars.
So, take your next vacation in a brand new Frigidare.
- Play a Hammond organ in your Damart underwear.
- Doctors say that babies should smoke 'til they are three.
- And people over 65 should bathe in Lipton Tea.