I Had a Little Chicken
(source: "The World's Best Funny Songs", Esther J. Nelson, 1988; also found in "The Worm Song and Other Tasty Tunes", Janet Wilson, 1993.)
(to the tune of "Turkey in the Straw")

Thanks to Nora McColl, who e-mailed me this song!

Well, I had a little chicken

And she wouldn't lay an egg

So I poured hot water all around her leg

And the little chicken hollered and the little chicken begged

And the gosh darn chicken laid a hard boiled egg!

Well, I had a little chicken

And she wouldn't lay an egg

So I poured hot chocolate all around her leg

And the little chicken hollered and the little chicken begged

And the gosh darn chicken laid an Easter egg!

Well, I had a little chicken

And she wouldn't lay an egg

So I poured gun powder all around her leg

And the little chicken hollered and the little chicken begged

And the gosh darn chicken laid a hand grenade!

Thanks to Sue Markle, who sent me these extra verses:

Poured hot oil... laid a fried egg

Poured chocolate... laid a Cadbury egg

Poured beet juice... laid a pickled egg

Poured some some milk... laid scrambled eggs

Poured some some dye... laid Easter eggs