They Say That At Camp Woolsey

They Say That at Camp Woolsey
(to the tune of "They Say That In The Army")
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the trails are really great.
You go to look for one kid; you wind up losing eight.
Chorus:
Oh, I don't want no more of camping life.
Gee, Ma, I want to go home.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the Guiders are quite fine,
But all they ever really do is sit on their behinds.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the cooks are really neat.
We'd really like to ask them what is the slime we eat.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the food it is gourmet.
You have the ham for supper, and bring it up next day.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the ham it comes in hunks,
But all the leaders tell me they'd rather eat the skunks.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the quartermaster's neat.
You bribe her with some cookies she'll give you lots of treats.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the quartermaster's first.
If you don't give her cookies she'll let you die of thirst.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the office staff is great.
We think their job description is one big coffee break.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the office staff is swell.
You ask them for one item, and all they do is yell.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, they all love nursey-pooh.
If you get diarrhoea, she gives you crazy glue.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, waterfront is keen.
Instead of watching swimmers, they rate the boating team.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the water's really clean,
But if you stop to smell it, you think it's a latrine.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the tents are really neat.
You wake up in the morning; there's critters on your feet.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, security is great.
Art jumps out of the bushes when Junior Staff is late.
They say that at Camp Woolsey, the director's really sweet,
But if we don't stop this singing, we won't get paid this week.
Last Chorus:
Oh, I don't want no more of camping life.
Gee, Ma, I want to go,
But they won't let me go.
Gee, Ma, I want to go home.