Hardships of Camp

Hardships of Camp
(to the tune of "The Battle Hymn of the Republic")
Chorus:
That's the way they treat the Girl Guides,
That's the way they treat the Girl Guides,
That's the way they treat the Girl Guides,
When they're all away at camp.
Leaders go by motor cars, Assistants go by bus,
Patrol Leaders have bicycles, and never make a fuss,
Seconds they have roller skates and roll along the way
But all the poor old Girl Guides get is marching all the way.
Leaders they have turkey, Assistants they have duck,
Patrol Leaders have chicken and think themselves in luck,
Seconds they have bully beef and sometimes they have lamb,
But all the poor old Girl Guides gets is bread and butter and jam.
Leaders they have coffee, Assistants they have tea,
Patrol Leaders have cocoa and drink it down with glee,
Seconds they have hot milk, and sometimes they have cold,
But all the poor old Girl Guides get is water when they're told.
Leaders they have feather beds, Assistants they have springs,
Patrol Leaders have mattresses and think themselves as kings,
Seconds they have pillow slips and stuff them up with straw,
But all the poor old Girl Guide gets is spleeping on the floor.
Leaders they have scented soap, Assistants they have Pears,
Patrol Leaders have Lavender and give themselves such airs,
Seconds they have Sunlight Soap to make their faces shine,
But all the poor old Girl Guide gets is Lifebuoy all the time.
Leaders they are married, Assistants are engaged,
Patrol Leaders are courting, although they're under age,
Seconds they are trying, and sometimes they succeed,
But all the poor old Girl Guide gets is Scouts with knobbly knees!
Captains they have bungalows, Lieutenants they have flats,
Patrol Leaders have wooden huts & think them grand at that
Seconds they have canvas tents, with groundsheets on the floors,
But all the poor old girl guide gets is sleeping out of doors
Captains they drink Whisky, Lieutenants they drink rum
Patrol leaders drink shandy 'cos it makes them look less glum
Seconds they drink lemonade, and sip it through a straw B
ut all the poor old girl guide gets is water more & more!
Captains go to Switzerland, Lieutenants go to France,
Patrol Leaders to Scotland, to see the Highland Dance
Seconds go to Edwinstowe, to see the Major Oak
But all the poor old Girl Guide gets is <Sutton> 'cos she's broke!